Bullies: Their Challengers
It is not, needless to say, only during our formative years, attending school, when we come across bullies. The bullies in the schoolyard seldom learn to reformulate their social interaction with other people through extending respect, patience and sympathy toward others. The bullies of our young years simply learn to mask their tendencies, refine their techniques and become more subtle at bullying. In adulthood they manipulate subtle slurs, needling, and occasionally resorting to the naked ugliness of aggression.
One such bully encounter occurred in Keswick Ontario, just recently, at Keswick High School, where a young Korean student found himself the target of a class bully. The bully who confronted the 15-year old cast a verbal slur referring to his Korean ancestry, and also assaulted him physically. Little did he know that the young Korean boy had been taught Taekwondo by his expert father, who admonished his son to only use his knowledge in extreme situations, and to forbear from using his right hand.
Feeling himself attacked and willing enough to defend himself from this unwarranted attention, he defended himself, and in the process - using his left hand - managed, without intention, to crack the bully's nose. All attention of the school authorities fell on the defender, not the attacker. Sympathy, madly enough, went to the bully whose provocation had led to his broken nose, none was left for the plight of the young boy who saw no option but to defend himself.
The outcome was, in a society that does not 'tolerate' bullying, that the victim of the bully who had been forced to defend himself, has been suspended from school, and, pending further investigation - by the school board and by the police - may face assault charges and possible expulsion from school. The young Korean boy's mother is aghast, and stated unequivocally how proud she is of her son. And well she should be.
Tellingly enough, in this instance many other students at Keswick High School have taken it upon themselves to organize a protest on behalf of the school-ostracized Korean student, supporting his decision to defend himself, and decrying the lunacy of the authorities in placing blame on and disciplining the victim, not the malefactor. Doubtless many others of the student body have been victims in the past of this bully finally given his just due. Without a doubt these students question the justness of their school board.
When our youngest son was the same age he was brutally attacked by a student two years older, two grades elevated, and beaten in full view of other students waiting for their homeward-bound bus. The bully who attacked our son was well known among the school community for his brutal oppression of other students. On this occasion he had a spray bottle full of some noxious substance that he was spraying others with. All the other students fell back without protest, submitting to the humiliation of being sprayed.
Only our son, shorter by a head and a half than the other, slight of build, stood up for himself, would not stand back, and demanded that the bully desist and hie himself off elsewhere. Confronted by someone who denied him his pleasure at preying on the timid and fearful, he dropped the bottle, wrestled our son to the ground, and began pounding him, breaking one of his front teeth in the process. Our son, physically no match for the other, did his best.
No one else, standing around, came to his assistance. His older brother and sister discovered what had occurred when they took a later bus home from school. Their younger brother insisted on calling the police and pressing charges. The police officer who interviewed our son in our presence admitted that the youth who attacked him was well known to them for similar occurrences. Others had begun the process of pressing criminal charges, but out of fear had withdrawn from the process.
Our son would not. He had his day in court. The family of the accused hired a high-priced lawyer. Our son insisted that he would represent himself. And he did. It was our son testifying, and the lawyer hired by the thug's family interrogating him, presenting a version quite unlike reality. The judge dismissed the fantasy of blamelessness put forth by the lawyer, spoke scathingly to the bully of his intolerable behaviour, and sentenced him accordingly.
We never heard anything more of the matter, having insisted that the thug's family pay an expiation of covering our son's dental bill. I did go to the high school to speak to the principal and vice-principal expressing my disgust when the thug was re-admitted some months later, back to school. And the lawyer went on to further acclaim in the community, celebrated for his good work and reputation, having a community centre named in his honour.
One such bully encounter occurred in Keswick Ontario, just recently, at Keswick High School, where a young Korean student found himself the target of a class bully. The bully who confronted the 15-year old cast a verbal slur referring to his Korean ancestry, and also assaulted him physically. Little did he know that the young Korean boy had been taught Taekwondo by his expert father, who admonished his son to only use his knowledge in extreme situations, and to forbear from using his right hand.
Feeling himself attacked and willing enough to defend himself from this unwarranted attention, he defended himself, and in the process - using his left hand - managed, without intention, to crack the bully's nose. All attention of the school authorities fell on the defender, not the attacker. Sympathy, madly enough, went to the bully whose provocation had led to his broken nose, none was left for the plight of the young boy who saw no option but to defend himself.
The outcome was, in a society that does not 'tolerate' bullying, that the victim of the bully who had been forced to defend himself, has been suspended from school, and, pending further investigation - by the school board and by the police - may face assault charges and possible expulsion from school. The young Korean boy's mother is aghast, and stated unequivocally how proud she is of her son. And well she should be.
Tellingly enough, in this instance many other students at Keswick High School have taken it upon themselves to organize a protest on behalf of the school-ostracized Korean student, supporting his decision to defend himself, and decrying the lunacy of the authorities in placing blame on and disciplining the victim, not the malefactor. Doubtless many others of the student body have been victims in the past of this bully finally given his just due. Without a doubt these students question the justness of their school board.
When our youngest son was the same age he was brutally attacked by a student two years older, two grades elevated, and beaten in full view of other students waiting for their homeward-bound bus. The bully who attacked our son was well known among the school community for his brutal oppression of other students. On this occasion he had a spray bottle full of some noxious substance that he was spraying others with. All the other students fell back without protest, submitting to the humiliation of being sprayed.
Only our son, shorter by a head and a half than the other, slight of build, stood up for himself, would not stand back, and demanded that the bully desist and hie himself off elsewhere. Confronted by someone who denied him his pleasure at preying on the timid and fearful, he dropped the bottle, wrestled our son to the ground, and began pounding him, breaking one of his front teeth in the process. Our son, physically no match for the other, did his best.
No one else, standing around, came to his assistance. His older brother and sister discovered what had occurred when they took a later bus home from school. Their younger brother insisted on calling the police and pressing charges. The police officer who interviewed our son in our presence admitted that the youth who attacked him was well known to them for similar occurrences. Others had begun the process of pressing criminal charges, but out of fear had withdrawn from the process.
Our son would not. He had his day in court. The family of the accused hired a high-priced lawyer. Our son insisted that he would represent himself. And he did. It was our son testifying, and the lawyer hired by the thug's family interrogating him, presenting a version quite unlike reality. The judge dismissed the fantasy of blamelessness put forth by the lawyer, spoke scathingly to the bully of his intolerable behaviour, and sentenced him accordingly.
We never heard anything more of the matter, having insisted that the thug's family pay an expiation of covering our son's dental bill. I did go to the high school to speak to the principal and vice-principal expressing my disgust when the thug was re-admitted some months later, back to school. And the lawyer went on to further acclaim in the community, celebrated for his good work and reputation, having a community centre named in his honour.
Labels: Human Relations, Justice, Values
posted by Pieface @ 6:40 PM
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