Much Ado

"It's either a major case of absent-mindedness or a massive deceit. It's very possible that complicity exists on a European level."
Tonio Borg, EU health and consumer commissioner

Not particularly because there have been slow news days. We are not short of news lately. Coming out of various points of the compass, and all of them riveting our attention on the inescapable fact that human nature is perverse, violently adverse and unpredictable. So perhaps a story that has shocked a nation of horse-lovers is really meant as a kind of diversion from the truly unspeakable news of mass slaughters of a different kind.

The British are extremely fond of equine companions. The well-to-do have traditionally kept thoroughbred stables on their properties. Riding is an accomplishment and a matter of pride. Competition in riding and jumping a sport for kings - and commoners alike.

The British also like their beef. And they prefer it unadulterated. Which is how they usually get it. Until they were shocked out of their collectively placid (sanguine?) attitudes by the stunning revelation that their beef was contaminated with horseflesh.

This is, of course, the same Britain that was glad to eat horsemeat back during the Great Wars, when all manner of normal meat consumption was disrupted as a result of global shortages in all kinds of comestibles. In the present era, however, there are no shortages of anything - with the exception of common sense, proportionality and a sense of humour.

Britain has been scandalized.

Horsemeat has illegally entered the market, passing itself off as beef and none the wiser. Until tests revealed that consumers have been eating beef contaminated with the presence of horsemeat. There are some societies that consider horsemeat a delicacy, and many others that think of it as a good alternative to other forms of animal flesh meant for human consumption. Not, however, Brits.

Councils throughout Britain have withdrawn processed beef dishes from their menus after shepherd's pies with a certain element of horsemeat included were sent to 47 schools. Hospital patients were also given beef meals containing equine DNA. Pubs, restaurants and supermarkets were all affected. "People will be shocked and dismayed that horsemeat has now been found in schools and hospitals", sagely commented the shadow environment secretary.

British police have raided companies suspected of selling the tainted meat. Inspectors from the Food Standards Agency seized computers, documents, meat samples for further testing. "Clearly, it is not acceptable for beef products to be sold containing horse meat", fumed a director at the agency.

Calling on Interpol.