Fending Off Rape

The issue of some women 

In some cultures women must refrain from being visible in public. In rigidly patriarchal societies like Pakistan, Saudi Arabia, in Egypt and Iran, Afghanistan and elsewhere in the world of Islam women are expected to garb themselves modestly, lest they awaken the innocent and natural ardour of males. A woman can provoke a man to behave in a manner inconsistent with the respect due her, if she appears to behave provocatively. Women are not to look directly at a man not their father or their husband. Nor must they allow a man other than a father or a husband to view them other than wrapped securely within an all-encompassing garment.

Women are held to have been responsible if they are sexually molested. Such women must have done something to communicate to a helpless man that they are prepared to entertain his advances. Nothing so much marks a woman with promiscuous ambition as her revealing garments of choice. If her hair can be seen, for example, if bare skin of an ankle flashing under a long garment is seen, if a glimpse of a bare wrist is permitted to make itself evident. Speaking in public with a man not of one's family is a clear invitation to sexual abuse.

If not by the man himself, then by a male extended-family member who, apprised of the recklessly humiliating behaviour of the female child or woman feels such punishment as rape has been warranted to avenge lost honour.

Those who live in the West where respect for women's privacy even when she is dressed for the street in casual wear or is dressed in revealing summer garments, on the other hand, can be reassured. And if a Western woman has a casual relationship with a man it is well understood that her wholesome female integrity is not to be questioned.

Sex in the West is a consensual affair, or no affair at all. Women must give unequivocal permission and men know how to restrain their impulses until such an assurance has been received. But of course, that's a dreamworld. Men in the West are quite capable, without the patriarchal culture of male entitlement in all things sexual and gender-related, but somehow inherent instead, of behaving just as badly with women as their oriental counterparts.

If a woman is being flirtatious, if she has groomed and garbed herself enticingly it is a clear indication that she has prepared herself to be taken by storm, or physically manhandled, or quite simply raped, because she was obviously "asking for it". Because of the prevalence of this kind of social disorder, a campaign to emphasize to men that they run the risk of being charged with rape if they take advantage of a woman incapable of fending for herself due to some kind of socially 'in' behaviour like being drunk and in the presence of males, was launched in Edmonton.

The campaign, "Don't Be That Guy", has the purpose of informing men that nothing should be taken for granted, and above all, advantage should not be taken of women incapable of preventing themselves from being abused sexually. It serves a social purpose that is functional and much needed to raise the awareness of men, particularly young men who have bought into a culture of easy sex that can be grabbed whenever an occasion appears to present itself.

To deliver the message that intimacy of that nature must be a reciprocal one, with both parties fully informed and willing.

Which doesn't belie that there does occur instances where women may, through regret or shame or malice sometimes claim rape when nothing like it occurred at all. But these incidents are few and far between, judged to be around 2% to 4% of cases. Not that even that number could or should be regarded casually, because these are serious charges and they are capable of profoundly interfering and damaging someone's life.

What is distinctly disturbing is that a men's group has taken the posters cautioning men to ensure that they don't take advantage of a woman because if she's incapable of giving consent what they're committing to is rape, and turning that campaign inside out. Mocking the posters that are meant to educate men to completely understand what the issues are, by turning the tables about and instructing women to set aside their after-sex regrets rather than claiming rape when none occurred.

Two of the Don't Be That Girl posters seen around Edmonton this week. The posters parody a successful anti-rape campaign developed in Edmonton and use images from the Don’t Be That Guy campaign with changed text to send different messages. Photo: Supplied

 Calgary Communities Against Sexual Abuse has posted their reaction to this disturbing event: "Posters like this are so damaging to the cause of ending sexual violence. To take a campaign that only seeks to educate community members on the laws of consent and the crime of sexual assault with the goal of ending this horrific and degrading crime and to mock it is not only unprofessional but inhumane". It's also pretty jejune.


But a survey released by the Canadian Women's Foundation indicates that 19% of respondents feel women should be aware of how they dress themselves and their alcohol consumption. Another 15% of Canadians according to the survey, believe that flirting encourages sexual assault, while 11% believe the wearing of short skirts provokes sexual assaults. Haven't we come a long way, baby? On the other hand, on the evidence, there is some truth to those perceptions, even if there shouldn't be.

"The belief that women are responsible for sexual assault because of their actions or appearance is still common in our society. It can cause women who have suffered abuse to stay silent and often feel responsible for what happened to them. Canadians must stop questioning and blaming sexual assault victims and start asking why some men rape women."
Anu Dugal, director of violence prevention, Canadian Women's Foundation

Amen.