Spare The Rod And Spoil The Child...?

Not all advice, obviously, is good advice. But advice from an influential evangelical Christian pastor/writer who with his wife wrote a pithy, informed and biblically-influenced how-to that authorizes parents to use physical force in restraining children's inner devil, was embraced by many thankful parents. The little book, To Train Up a Child, published in 1994 has been translated into 11 languages, with 670,000 sold.

But Michael and Debi Pearl, the book's authors, believe in tough love, but love above all. And in disciplining a child one must be aware of limits. Although the book does recommend using a plastic pipe with which to persuade a child's backside that the penalties of misbehaviour are not pleasant. The trouble with that kind of corporal punishment, of course, is that frustration and anger tend to get out of control.

And, of course, children are generally rebellious by nature. They question and they challenge, and they misbehave because they are children. They are testing the boundaries of their world, while discovering what is out there, and what is in themselves. Pastor Pearl denies that his book exhorts parents to use violence as a means to bring children into line, to make them well behaved.

He urges the readers of his book to use the rod only when anger has passed, and never for extended periods of time. A last resort type of thing. And to desist if it seems that the discipline of the rod is not performing its ameliorative function. He is inspired by Proverbs 13: "He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes."

The trouble is that their suggestion that a 10 to 12-inch-long willow branch on a child as young as one - or a one-foot ruler, belt, or three-foot cutting of a shrub; something with flexibility that will inflict pain but which will not overtly bruise the skin or leave distressing marks - seems quite excessive as an influencing tool for good behaviour. In persuading a parent to become that violent with a young child he is encouraging brutality.

According to the Pearl training method, initiated in infancy, a parent is to place something intriguing in front of a child, and when the child reaches for it, he is struck with a switch. In the teaching of obedience this seems somewhat akin to what some dog trainers advance for training dogs. It doesn't work for dogs; punishment that is, so why should it work for human animals?

It's why there are dog rescue groups. And it's why there are state agencies that step in to remove children from abusive home settings. Although sometimes it is too late. As was the case with three children all of whose parents had copies of Pastor Pearl's book of advice reflecting what he believed to be a Christian lifestyle. Which one commentator a religious scholar names "gutter theology."

Three children, beaten with plastic tubes for prolonged periods of time, who died after being viciously abused. Their parents charged with second-degree murder and torture or voluntary manslaughter and unlawful corporal punishment. Two little girls, one thirteen who died of hypothermia and malnutrition, deprived of food, forced to sleep in a barn, whipped on her legs.

Another little girl whose parents beat her for hours, taking care to take breaks frequently for prayer intervals. And a four year old boy who, along with his siblings was beaten daily with a plumbing tube, the "rod" that ensured the child was not spoiled.

Not spoiled, just life-deprived.